Imagine this: you have been feeling “off” fora very long time. Sad. Sometimes angry. Distracted. Very unhappy. It has definitely made your life difficult. You may have had outbursts and lost a few friends. You struggle at work and really need to pull it together. This is SO not normal to you. So you see a psychiatrist who diagnoses you with Depression. This may seem devastating, but at least it is an answer to this perplexing problem.
So you decide to seek out some groups that may be able to understand you. Perhaps even on the internet at first. And this is what you find:
You: Hi, I’m new here. Any advice on Depression? Thx! ODD1: Depressed? Suck it up. At least you aren’t schizophrenic. Missy54: You still have your family. When your whole world is destroyed, then you can say you have problems. JJ22: I’m bipolar and struggling to stay sober. Can’t hold a job and can’t pay for my meds. You’re just having a bad day.
WOW!Does this really happen?Yes. Screen names and content have been changed, but I have seen similar conversations on social networking sites. There are actual arguments among groups of people diagnosed with mental illness about who has the worst diagnosis. Or whose life is in worse shape. Or who is on the strongest medication. It’s almost like a competition. Like being discriminated against for what you don’t have.
It’s shocking that shame not only comes from the “outside world”. It seems to also occur from within the groups themselves. When we thought we had found kindred spirits, a sort of fraternal bond, we may realize that we don’t fit in as well as we thought.
But, chin up! There are many groups out there where you can go and find positive, supportive friends who can relate to what you are going through. The Calendar of Activities on this website can provide you with a good place to get started! Remember not to get caught up in comparing battle scars. Be friendly and helpful if you can. Be aware of your surroundings and you will find your journey to a healthy, happy future a very enlightening experience!
StigmaHurts is part of the Mental Health Awareness Committee of Ocean County, NJ All comments and questions should be directed to mail@stigmahurts.com